I'm a shadow. I'm a shell. I'm an outline of something I once knew.
I'm just a representation.
I hide myself. I hide myself.
In smoke. In mirrors.
I am lost. I am tangled. I am tangible.
I want to feel lighter than air and thinner than life.
A little bit of sinew on a little bit of bone.
An alcoholic anorexic. Anything for a constant haze.
A bleary mind so I can keep remembering to forget.
What I was, what I housed.
A small dependent child who wanted out
but couldn't stay to play.
Get it over with, rip it out and destroy it.
I'l hardly feel a thing.
As I sink farther inward until all is gone completely.
(Just a little bit of mass, I've found, works better in this world.)
2003
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